Attacked
My husband and I don’t remember what we were discussing or debating. We both remember exactly where we were and the resulting treasured phrase. Kevin and I were driving to church. It was just the two of us as we hadn’t had children yet. It was sunny, but the attitude inside the car felt anything but sunny. I was getting perturbed with my husband or at the very least my patience was wearing thin. Then, oddly, Kevin says, “The Whorlanese people like me.” It was stated as a rebuttal. It completely threw me off. First of all, who are the Whorlanese? And secondly, Kevin has never traveled overseas. Where did he meet another people group? I doubted he had some secret pen-pal relationship with an entire people.
I couldn’t let this one go. I asked, “Who are the Whorlanese?” “What?” He replied. I sighed heavily and asked, “What did you just say?” He clearly and slowly said, “The world needs people like me.” And then I couldn’t stop laughing. I told him what I thought he had said and ever since it’s been one of our favorite phrases. Whenever we don’t see eye to eye or one of us suspects we’re being viewed in an unfavorable light, we say, “The Whorlanese people like me.” It’s kind of like the child who has an imaginary friend, only it’s not just one friend, it’s an entire people group. There, acceptance is found.
Throughout life we are attacked. We experience it in childhood and it continues throughout adulthood. We are attacked at times by coworkers, our culture, neighbors, friends, and family. Relationships are messy. There have been several times that I have thought to myself that I’d have a great relationship with God if it weren’t for the messy relationships in my life. God doesn’t call us out of messy relationships. He calls us to bring Him into them. (Abusive relationships are different. Get out and seek help.)
Possibly, our greatest attacker is ourself. We can really beat ourselves up! We know our weaknesses, deficiencies, and fears. This can cause a mental “perfect storm” in which we work ourselves into depression, self-pity, and inaction. We allow ourselves to play the victim. This is not where God wants us. It’s not who He believes us to be.
For some of us, including myself, can go one step further. It’s actually my own comfort that chains me. Think about your personal comfort zone. Has it ever held you back? It has for me, time after time. You see, I am an introvert. I am someone who enjoys and needs quiet time. Big get-togethers and meeting new people wears me out. Yet, God calls us to be in relationship. This is what I call the “curse of the introvert.”
I vividly remember a time when I attended a church women’s retreat in my early 20’s. I didn’t know many ladies and was hoping to make some friends. One evening there was a social time with hot cocoa and s’mores. Many ladies were standing in circles and talking. I was standing by myself. It was then that the self-attack began. “Nobody likes you. You’re the odd one. You could leave and no one would notice.” On and on it went. And I let it. I was comfortable by myself. But I wasn’t happy. I convinced myself that someone should be including me.
Since then I’ve learned that most of us are simply unaware. I allowed myself to be part of the problem. Now I realize I need to step into a circle and join a conversation, despite how uncomfortable it is. It is time to break the shackles of my comfort zone and stop attacking myself. This will take energy, courage, and some quiet time later to recharge, but I will be happier having conquered an inner battle.
When I am feeling attacked, whether it is real or imagined, I turn my thoughts to the many things God says about me. I am a child of the King. I am precious. I have purpose. Then I think about all that He has arranged in my life, and before my life, so that I would know Him and be treasured by Him. Try it. Remember He not only loves you, He wants to be with you. He created you for a purpose. You have strengths and weaknesses that are to be used within the community of believers. Be in community. Remember, the world needs people like you. It really does.
Scriptures for this week. Share some thoughts. What is your comfort zone and has it held you back? How do you fight self attacks?
2 Corinthians 4:6-18
Psalm 123
2 Corinthians 7:5-7
2 Timothy 1:6-12
Isaiah 11:1-9
Originally posted April 8, 2019
Such a great story! I can be an introvert or an extrovert depending on my mood or environment. I also frequently fall into the trap of listening to the negative voices in my head. I have always tried to remind myself that we are all human, made perfect by Him with our own strengths and weaknesses for a reason. I recently did a Bible study that has been such a blessing in this area and I’m now starting to catch myself before going down that path. It’s called “Truthfilled” by Ruth Chou Simons. She walks through practicing preaching gospel truth to ourselves.
Thanks for sharing this resource with us, Patti. I’m so glad it is helping you to catch those negative thoughts before they take root. So much of life is an internal battle; a battle of belief. It is hard to fight that battle when the truth isn’t clearly known, so I really like her title!
Heather, I can so identify with your thoughts here as I am also an introvert. I am fine to be with just a few close friends or family members, but very uncomfortable in large groups. Therefore, I sometimes deprive myself of events that I would probably enjoy, but worry about the social aspect of them. It helps me to consider that there may be others just like me and I can seek them out to help them be more comfortable. Thinking about God’s love and our value and purpose will certainly help with these challenges.
What a great idea! Be a safe place in the midst of a social “storm”. Some absolutely love the noise and interaction, while others just want a safe-haven on the sidelines. I love that you seek to reach out to others in the midst of your discomfort. Thanks for sharing, Glenda!
I loved your story. It’s so wonderful that God gave us the ability to laugh & have humor in our lives.I’ll tell you a story in my life but first I was the same as you. I do not like being the center of attention and content to be in the back. I would go to a meeting or get togethers with the women at church only to allow the deceiver to tell me I was unimportant & no one cares about any thoughts or ideas I might have! It took several years but I eventually with prayer stepped out of and away into God’s light to talk out loud & know i still do matter to God! My story is 2 fold. When my husband & I would get irritated with one another one of us would say to the other I’ll say I’m sorry if you say your sorry, it usually ended up with us smiling & giving a big hug. My husband was a humorous person to say the least. He would tell me when I die have me creamated & put my ashes in our water bed then you can tell everybody that you sleep with me every night! I told himl well that’s fine til I drain the bed then u will be out with all dirt!
What wonderful memories of your husband. Those need to be passed down through the generations! And yes, the deceiver want to isolate each one of us and beat us down. Way to go to put him in his place. You do matter and are a precious part of the body of Christ! So glad you shared with us, Susan!
My 12 year old granddaughter told me once that she was shy, which I had not realized. I told her that it seemed to me that she was outgoing, not shy. She smiled and said that is because when I am in a group, I change my focus from myself to others around me. I imagine them as shy and I approach them to make them feel better. Very insightful for a young girl. We could all learn from her. I am also an introvert and am uncomfortable in groups of people. I work on adopting her philosophy.
Such sage advice from a bright young lady! She is way ahead of the curve. Thanks for sharing. Great perspective and very helpful!